From wwwwolf@iki.fi Sat Jun 27 12:49:01 1998 Path: news.eunet.fi!wwwwolf From: wwwwolf@iki.fi (Urpo Lankinen) Newsgroups: rec.games.roguelike.nethack Subject: [RGRNCA] Re: DiRT Magazine chat meeting to discuss first issue Date: 26 Jun 1998 21:14:44 GMT Organization: WWWWolf's den Lines: 192 Message-ID: References: <6mvj5q$lun@newsops.execpc.com> NNTP-Posting-Host: wwwwolf.pp.fi Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=iso-8859-1 Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit X-FurryCode: FCWm3adm A+C-DH+M+PR+T++W-ZSm RLU a19cl+++d-ef+h*i++p-sm X-YiffCode: Yiff1.0Mhet P-- Z-- T! S+ V+ H(wolf,*)+ aIr X-RGRNCA-Activity: RGRNCA RIDES AGAIN! X-Newsreader: slrn (0.9.4.3 UNIX) [It's morning. Quiet morning. Birds sing in trees, and everyhing is quiet outside of the Nethack Cafe. However, things are not really nice inside of the Cafe. For some days, the commander of RGRNCA has not been around; fortunately for the regulars, they have been able to do some things to stop the d00ds and their tiresome rantings. Let's take a look inside the cafe. An "anonymous" d00d is right now in the Cafe, shouting LOUDLY at the customers. Fortunately, this old building has good sound-proofing, or else this shouting would seriously cramp the tranquility that lies outside of the building. Tranquility? Not quite. The sun rises right now. High above the leaves, an attack helicopter can be seen. It comes closer and closer, bringing more and more noise to the ears that happen to be listening. We now see the chopper clearly. It's Kewlashnikow Aircrafts KA-205 Ilukkevotnel (nicknamed Vottie), a really advanced attack helicopter. A slate-blue RGRNCA logos have been painted to the green sides of the helicopter. From outside, we see a silhouette of an anthropomorphic wolf who sits in the cockpit. He's obviouslu about to say something to the radio mic...] This is Vottie One coming from RL sector... come in, Base. [We hear static noise and a machine voice replying, "Roger Vottie one, give your destination."] Base, Vottie One is approaching Octathrope One Eight Six One Four Eight Roger Juliet, I repeat, Octathrope One Eight Six One Four Eight Roger Juliet, and needs to land at 2000 hours Zulu. [We hear robot replying "Copy that, Vottie One. Clear to land." Back to the Cafe. It is obvious that the ranting has not stopped. The d00d is still ranting:] On Fri, 26 Jun 1998 02:36:55 -0500, me wrote: >irc.ais.net >#DiRT_magazine >friday >until 3pm central time. >not likely too early (ie., before 9 or 10 am) > >i'd really appreciate seeing you there. > >thanks. > >~b >http://spamah.spamah.spamah.spamah.d00da.d00da.hei.hoi.spammity.spam.d00d/ [The d00d suddently stops his d00dings. Something is wrong. He sees some newbies smiling at him. All he has seen so far has been sings of anger. He listens carefully. A quiet music can be heard coming from the speaker set next to the bulletin board. Jashpar, the peaceful werejackal who acts as a waiter, smiles a little at the d00d and turns the volume up. Ride of the Valkyries. No wonder the newbies were smiling. Thundering noise of the helicopter blades can be heard from outside. The d00d correctly notes that cold pearls of sweat have appeared to his forehead. He suddently gets very nervous, turns around and looks out of the window. ...and screams in horror what he sees. He collapses to his knees... Too late for him to escape. The door bursts open, and WWWWolf rushes in, brandishing his trusty old RK200bt...] RGRNCA RIDES AGAIN! This group is again under constant surveillance of the Advisory - citizens can now leave their d00dslicers home. ::WWWWolf points the d00d with his rifle. The d00d is obviously having a bad day - he has curled into small ball, snivels, mewls and pukes and tries to make noises that sounds like maaaamaamaaamaaa.... WWWWolf gives his best "you are too stupid to live" look to the cr3t1n. And smiles somewhat oddly.:: I'm back. And, to quote S.P.U.T.U.M folks, "Yummy Yummy Yummy we've got 'Pinks' in our tummy and we feel like kicking @ss, like kicking @sssss...." ::WWWWolf grabs the cretin from throat, neatly pulls him up and close to him and peers deep into the eyes of the d00d...:: You have been very, very naughty. And very, very stupid. And very, very, very, very, very stupid. Yes, I know I said it twice, but you're so stupid I just *had* to say it twice. Your Serious Offence: Spamming. You tried to make the Very Commong And Obviously Higly Respected D00daregexpingad0dal1zat10n what I call "Regexping" - I said "highly respected" but that probably just applies to the d00ds, not to the normal people. You see... Normal. People. Just. Hate. It. When. People. Cross. Post. To. rgrn. And. The. D00D. Thinks. This. Is. Relevant. Group. Too. Did I said it slowly enough for you to comprehend? I hope so. Emacs autowrap had problems breaking that line. Don't make me to kluge my Emacs. That makes me, you know, REALLY angry. Especially when I have this short attention span. My job is to tell you that... Abuse report... is... ON... ITS... WAY! Okay, then the Real Offense: Posting From An ISP With Good Abuse Reporting Scheme. Ah, You see, you think you are some bloke called "me" ... You think you will not get any mail about this at all, but hey, you know what... Newsgroups: (n+1 groups, not included here) Organization: Exec-PC BBS Internet - Milwaukee, WI Message-ID: <6mvj5q$lun@newsops.execpc.com> ^^^^^^^^^^ NNTP-Posting-Host: crinoth-14.mdm.rnd.execpc.com ^^^^^^^^^^ X-Trace: daily-planet.newsops.execpc.com 898846714 22487 (None) 169.207.45.30 X-Complaints-To: abuse@execpc.com Uh now, people, our spam-hating citizens: Is this spam? ::WWWWolf cheerfully listens to the crowd that shouts "YES!":: That's right! Do we know from where it originated, and how it originated? ::WWWWolf cheerfully listens to the crowd again, hearing the crowd shouting "YES WE DO! FROM EXEC-PC!":: That's right too! And now, the best question of all... Do we know where to send our complaints to? ::Another listening break. WWWWolf hears another shout: "YES WE DO! !":: That's right again! Let's proceed to the Greatest Moment in RGRNCAMU message: The LARTing! ::WWWWolf drags d00d out of the door, drops him to the ground under the helicopter and grins wickedly. He climbs to the helicopter and grins REALLY wickedly. He gets some altitude with the thing - about 100 feet - and shouts down from the bottom of his lungs so that the d00d can hear...:: See that fly in a spider's web down there in the forest? Oh, you can't. I forgot that you humans don't see that far. Okay, I will blow it up with this small rocket. You know, I will just show you my little new RGRNCA war toy to you before I execute you. chmod a+x d00d and somesuch... ::WWWWolf prepares to push the launching button, locks the rocket on fly and utters "Terve, terve, tässä on todellakin Hukka" before he pushes the button. Something malfunctions - the rocket is released, but the rocket engine doesn't start. Instead, it falls on the hapless d00d.:: <<>> Hmmm... Small problems with our rocket engines, it seems. Oh well, I have to get the original are desc from my tf logs and re-@desc the area later. ::WWWWolf lands the chopper, and walks into the cafe. He stops at the verandah and breathes deep, looking around the clearing.:: Ah... This is the best work place I have ever been. I love this job. Hmmm. Philosophical moment, I guess. Okay, here's a small bit of wisdom: Usenet is a war zone. The normal people are civilians, the admins and volunteers are soldiers, and the enemy is the hardest enemy of all - the human stupidity. Maybe the things just are that way... ::WWWWolf ponders on this for a moment, then starts whistling innocently and returns to the cafe.:: - Signed, WWWWolf of rec.games.roguelike.nethack CR3T1NZ advisory (Mobile Unit), Vestrum Excrucibo (Our battlecry: "Wrong Newsgroup, pal!") -- WWWWolf (known to some as Urpo Lankinen), just another lupine technomancer ICQ:4291042 -==(RGRNCA)==-